Better than Dancing with the Stars!

Got this story from Jon Keller who took our class in St.Louis. This is such a great story i asked him if I could post it here. This is a beautiful picture of intergenerational youth ministry. Way to go Jon!

Mark,
I attended "Rethinking Traditional Youth Ministry Models" presented
by you and Brock in St Louis. Again, I thank you for your study
and research in this area. I have been uneasy about youth ministry
for the last several years and know a shift needs to happen. Personally
I believe the shift needs to move more toward family ministry and
inter-generational ministry.The other night I think I saw what this
kind of ministry should look like.

I have a daughter, Andrea who is 15 years old. This past spring a boy
at her school(Clayton)asked her if she would be interested in taking
Ballroom dancing lessons with him. She accepted the invitation and
they have been having a ball ever since.

At the start of this school year Clayton asked me if he could again ask
my daughter to take a second set of lessons with him. I told him he
was welcome to ask her but she would probably turn him down because
the lessons were on the same night as her small group. (My daughter
loves her small group!) That is why I was shocked when she told me
that she accepted Clayton's invitation again to take more Ballroom
dancing lessons.

Two weeks ago Clayton and Andrea invited my wife and I to go watch
them dance, so we went with them. I then understood why my
daughter chose to miss half her small group each Wednesday night to
go to dancing lessons. As we walked into the dance hall we were warmly
greeted. My wife and I took a place at a table at the back of the
dance floor and Andrea and Clayton took to the dance floor. Most of
the people there were forty or older. Andrea and Clayton were the
youngest in the crowd. During one dance Andrea and Clayton

were struggling with the steps. The next thing I saw was an older couple coming up to them - the gentleman took Andrea and the lady took Clayton and they
helped them learn the dance. After that dance Andrea and Clayton came
over to my wife and me. I told Andrea that it was nice of that older
couple to help them out with the last dance. She responded "Ha! We're
their favorites!" That is when it clicked for me. It just wasn't dance
lessons! Andrea and Clayton felt part of a community of caring
adults. This is why dance was as important to her as her small group!
Here was a group of adults passionate about Ballroom dancing and they
wanted to share their passion with the younger generation. I thought to
myself, "this is what youth ministry should look like!"

Later, two of the dance instructors invited my wife and me to the
dance floor. I am not a dancer and I tried to explain that to the
instructor, but she said that was okay, she would teach me. She soon
had me moving across the floor with her.

What an image for the Church and youth ministry.

Is Youth Ministry Good For Youth?

I thought I would post a statement I made during the discussion at the CCC in St. Louis to get everyone else's take. I was kind of afraid to say it amongst a huge group of youth pastors, but I went for it. Here's what I said:

"This is something that I've been thinking about for a while. I wonder if youth ministry has actually been a disservice to teenagers, that we have done more harm than good. We see companies pandering to teenagers and so we feel like we have to do the same thing, so we pander to their desires. We have given them a product that works for them, but when they graduate, nobody is pandering to them anymore, which contributes to them leaving the church in droves. Which forces us to now hire young adult pastors."

I'm not sure if I said it in exactly those terms, but that's the general idea. I would love to get some feedback. Thanks...

I think I threw up in my mouth a little! This is awesome!

If you weren't in St.Louis for the NYWC you missed this. The context. There was a cheerleading competition going on in the same convention hall as YS so they had to mock it. Priceless.

So UnChristian!

So I picked up the new book Unchristian by Barna at the convention and I have really enjoyed the first 100 pages. It basically so far says we are in a mess, at least the image of Christian is in serious need of rebranding. So far it echoes many of the things we talked about in the seminar, here are a couple juicy tidbits.

"Hurtful experiences with Christians are a part of the stories of nearly one out of every two young people who are atheists, agnostics, or of some other faith."

"The vast majority of outsiders have been to Christian churches and have heard the message of Christ."

"Spirituality is important to young adults, but many consider it just one element of a successful, eclectic life. Fewer than one out of ten young adults mention faith as their top priority."

I'll post more later.

Take Care,

Mark Helsel